SAN MARCOSSAN MARCOS — Dozens of San Elijo Middle School parents took to Facebook and elsewhere to express anger with school s for broadcasting an anti-bullying video in classes Thursday that depicted a young girl deciding to commit suicide.
The three-minute fictionalized video, called “Sticks and Stones,” shows a girl who had become depressed due to bullying. “Sticks and stones may break your bones, but words never will,” she says. “Truth is, they can. They took my happiness away.”
The video shows the girl bemoaning that no one understands the anguish she has endured from bullies. She concludes that suicide might be an out. “I’m sorry if I hurt you,” she says. “It has to be this way. I’m going to heaven.”
As the video ends, the girl is seen standing on a stool and staring through a hangman’s noose, saying “This was the only way to find my happiness.”
The video was shown to more than 2,000 sixth- through eighth-grade students over the campus’ closed-circuit television network. The network is used for announcements, to lead kids in pledging allegiance to the U.S. flag, and sometimes to remind students to be healthy and treat others with kindness.
Some parents said Thursday’s broadcast was inappropriate, and parents should have been made aware that such material would be shown.
“The video left parents in the dark,” said San Elijo parent Kelly Pironti, who has a sixth-grade daughter at the school.
Kevin Larson, whose seventh-grade daughter attends the school, said the video left an indelible mark on his child. “Honestly, I’m floored that they would allow something like this happening.” he said. “She is already trying to figure things out, then they throw this in the mix.”
San Elijo Principal Gary DeBora said Friday afternoon that the parents who expressed concerns seemed mostly worried about how the video was presented, not what it contained.
“We apologized for upsetting any students or parents,” said DeBora. “The video did not show anything violent or anyone committing suicide.”
DeBora said the school has stepped up its anti-bullying message this year because — as enrollment has grown in recent years — “name-calling” and other bullying antics has picked up some steam.
“Until every student feels safe and loved, we’re going to fight it,” he said.
In a email and automated phone call to parents Thursday evening, DeBora said he understands the concerns and appreciates the . In a followup broadcast on Friday, he and his anti-bullying team of s were standing ready to offer help to students.
“While the intent of the video was to show how mean words and actions can have a negative impact on students, we understand that some students may have been upset by the video,” DeBora said. “We also understand that parents may be upset, and we are taking steps to vet this process of communication in the future.”
Pironti said that the apology was too little, too late.
Bullying is a “very complex subject and the results, whether suicide, depression, exclusion or acting out, are also subjects that need to be handled in a much more sensitive manner,” she said.
“It was an egregious error in judgment to go forward with a topic and not include parents with at least a warning of the material being presented, and it is irresponsible that this topic included no forum or safe environment for discussion of the feelings and thoughts that this poignant video was designed to bring up,” she added.
DeBora said in his message to parents that school counselors and others were available to students if they are feeling sad or upset. He said that the school also plans a parents-only forum on March 23 to discuss the subject in greater detail.
San Marcos Unified School District spokeswoman Anna Lucia Roybal said in a written statement that the district will continue to “educate and provide consequences until every student on the San Elijo Middle School campus feels safe.”
She added that “being mean to others is not going to be tolerated.”
